Dating a drug addict can be stressful, even if you’re not an addict yourself. Two addicts in love sounds more reasonable, but it might be difficult to empathize with your partner’s troubles if you have never struggled with drug addiction.
You may date someone who develops a drug addiction while you’re together. The truth is that we can’t select who we love. Furthermore, being with the right person entails accepting both the good and the bad.
You might date someone who is sober when you first meet them, but they later relapse into a drug problem you were unaware of. You may fall in love with a drug addict, yet they still make you happy. There are numerous examples of “the heart wants what it wants,” yet this does not imply that the road will be simple.
Substance misuse and good relationships are not compatible. When a person with a substance use disorder begins addiction treatment, counselors will advise them not to date anyone until they have completed a year of recovery.
This article will provide you with useful information about being with an addict.
The Consequences of Dating an Addict
When you date someone addicted to something, it has several negative consequences that affect various elements of the relationship. The relationship can feel extremely different depending on where they are in their addiction. When they’re sober, the relationship may feel terrific, but you may feel like you’re dating an entirely different person when they’re high.
When you date an addict, there will be many ups and downs because addiction is an illness, and it’s unethical to criticize a person based on their disease, right? Many addicts are extremely self-centered, and you will never be their top priority if they are actively using drugs. They’d be able to quit using if you were since they’d be afraid of losing you.
Don’t Fall Into the Trap of Being an Accomplice
An accomplice to a crime is held criminally accountable in the same way as the perpetrator. For example, if you and the person you’re dating are in the car and they’re high or have drugs on them when you’re pulled over, you’ll both be arrested and charged.
An accomplice is someone who assists (or fails to prevent) another person from committing a crime. Even if you don’t do drugs, dating someone who does is a terrible reality because you could get in trouble.
It is possible to date someone who has a drug problem without becoming an accomplice, but it will be contingent on both of you respecting the boundaries you set together.
A Disease Does NOT Excuse Bad Behavior
It’s a good thing that addiction is classified as an illness since it permits medical insurance companies and providers to treat it as such when an addict seeks treatment. The fact that addiction is a disease is not a valid justification for bad behavior.
Nobody deserves to be mistreated. Even if your partner is actively taking drugs, it’s crucial to recognize your worth and be treated fairly. Even if you can turn a blind eye to drug usage, you should expect to be treated fairly.
Healthy Boundaries
Setting realistic limits is an important tactic for maintaining a successful relationship. To coexist with another person on a long-term basis, you must learn to create limits. You decide what’s appropriate to ask for, but all parties must understand and respect the limits you establish.
Some examples of dating addict-related restrictions include:
- Please don’t deceive me.
- Please don’t take anything from me.
- Keep your distance from me if you’re inebriated.
- Don’t make me a co-conspirator.
If someone crosses the lines you’ve established together, it’s time to stand firm and walk away.
A Relationship with Someone who is “In Recovery”
Dating a recovering addict is not the same as dating someone who is currently abusing drugs, yet they both suffer from addiction. Being “in recovery” suggests they are receiving therapy for their drug addiction; the term is sometimes used interchangeably with “in remission.”
It is possible to have a healthy and joyful relationship with someone in recovery. However, dating a recovered addict comes with the disclaimer that most persons in recovery consider themselves to be “in recovery” indefinitely, and relapse is always a possibility (some people even expect it.)
Get Relationship Counseling
Getting expert help may be the best advice for being in a relationship with an addict or someone in recovery. I am a major proponent of treatment in general. Even if there isn’t anything wrong, everyone can benefit from assistance from time to time; speaking with a professional is a proactive strategy to keep problems under control.
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists (LMFT) are relationship professionals who have studied and helped couples with problems for years. Seeing an LMFT on a regular basis will aid in the creation and management of boundaries, the constructive management of conversations and arguments, the provision of a safe space to voice concerns, and the clarification of what is and is not working.
Addiction Treatment in Southern California
Numerous evidence-based treatment programs are available to help people manage their addictive behaviors and relationships. Addiction counselors are qualified and skilled in the knowledge of substance use disorder and its effects on relationships, from the early stages of addiction to recovery (and vice versa.) Peer-led aftercare support organizations, such as drugs anonymous, help people manage their lives and relationships while dealing with addiction. Participating in these groups is extremely beneficial to both your sobriety and your relationships.
If you’re in a relationship with an addict, here are some tips: In addition to seeking individual, family, or both types of therapy, peer support groups can provide advice, strength, and assistance. We at Covenant Hills Treatment offer guidance to residents of Southern California in relationships with addicts who need additional guidance to navigate impediments to their relationship, just call 844-268-8412.