When I was young, I never really understood church religion or God but I went along with it. When I was 10, I moved in with my mom who was not religious at all. I didn’t continue my Christianity. My life started to slowly unravel. At that point I started drinking and smoking weed when I was 13 that eventually led to me not caring about anything besides partying and ultimately led me to drugs.
When I first arrived at Pacific Hills Treatment Centers, I hadn’t spoken to God in at least 5 years. But even in that time that I was not exploring my Christianity, I always knew that God had a plan for me. He was just waiting for me to willing follow it. One of the staff members suggested that I try praying for God to show me a path. What I had done in the past obviously didn’t work. So I indulged. At first I wasn’t noticing or feeling anything so I figured my suspicions were right. But I kept at the path. I started to notice something. Everything and everybody was pointing me in a direction. I was just too fearful to want to follow it. Then I had an epiphany. This must be the start of God’s plan for me, the pathway to stay in California and continue treatment in a sober living. I was still very fearful of leaving my friends and family behind but gave my will to God and started the long journey of following him.
I have seen a tremendous change in myself in the aspects of willingness and determination. I am tired of failing in keeping my sobriety. I am tired of having to go through treatment. But most of all I am tired of having to restart my recovery and losing everything that I’ve gained. I’ve realized that I cannot do this on my own and who better to guide me than our Lord and Savior. I am finally ready and willing to let Him help me.
AA and the steps do great things for alcoholics. But it is more than following a program just to keep you sober. It’s bettering you as an individual and in whole having a fulfilled life. I believe that if anybody including a norm thoroughly follows the steps that it will do the same thing.